Choosing Self-love

It’s been a while since I’ve posted for good reason and no reason at all, yet I here I am. When I first began this blog, A Journey to Self-love, it came after the realization that walking away is one of the biggest indicators that you love yourself. It could be walking away from a romantic relationship, a job, a family member, or a lifestyle as examples. Walking away denotes choice. Choosing what’s best for yourself requires love.

Therefore letting a situation just fad away, or simply running away is not an active choice. Neither is avoiding a person without acknowledging what you’re doing or offering an explanation even, if it’s to yourself, for removing yourself doesn’t mean your action or lack thereof hails from self-love. Because a symptom of self-love is permission. Permission to choose what is right for you even when it’s hard to say, even if it means being unattached to something or someone that has always been there.

Another symptom is not going back. You walked away for a reason; it was broken. It was not fulfilling your needs. And your needs are important and valuable. Don’t let self-doubt, society, or your homegirls talk you into returning to your place of pain. Just because you haven’t figured out what the other side looks like yet, doesn’t mean it’s not the place for you. Staying in a situation that continues to make you feel less than is not an option and if you truly love yourself you will not return.

The last symptom I will highlight today is validation or the lack of needing it. When you don’t love yourself enough, you know but aren’t always ready to come to terms with what it means. So you seek validation from others about your choices. Doesn’t sound like a bad thing, right? Well it is if you’re seeking it from multiple sources until you get one person to “convince” you not to leave. Instead of seeking approval for choosing your best interest, you seek out someone to feed your insecurities. Not relying on that one out five’s advice shows you love yourself to say enough.

Now to recap. Loving yourself means giving yourself permission to choose what’s best for you. It means refusing to return to people, places, or things that hurt you. And, it means not expecting others to validate your bad choices.

Thanks for reading!

I would love to hear what you think about these three symptoms and others you think I should add.
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